Do you need a wedding register? Modern day wedding etiquette

January 15, 2016

Did you know that you don’t actually have to have a wedding register? Despite what your mother or mother-in-law to-be may say, a gift registry is no longer an absolute requirement for the modern day wedding.

Many couples live together before tying the knot these days, often making a wedding register – traditionally used to kit out the couple’s new home – redundant.


Before we get too carried away from the idea however, there are a few reasons why you should consider having a register:


  • It makes it easy on your guests – they’re going to get you a gift either way, and a register makes it easy to know what to get
  • It makes it easy on you – if you make a list of things you might actually like, chances are you’ll end up with more things you like than things you don’t like or need


If you do want to have a register but don’t necessarily need a whole lot of things think of it as an opportunity to upgrade some items and to get some more useful and fun things.

Clever wishing well items include:

  • Board games
  • A tent or camping gear
  • Travel guidebooks
  • Cookbooks
  • A picnic blanket or set

If this doesn’t suit your style, luckily there is a simple, modern alternative: the wishing well.

If you’d prefer to have a wishing well, asking your guests for money instead of gifts, here are a couple of tips to make it a success and not step on any toes.


  • Tell your guests how you will use the money – this gives them an incentive if you’re saving for a house or honeymoon together for example
  • Explain it in the card – tell your guests your wishes in a sweet way, perhaps with a poem


Hot Tip! If you really don’t need or want anything, why not pay it forward by registering with a charity and asking your guests to donate on your behalf.


Nathalie is the chief wedding coordinator and head of marketing at Pillingers. With over ten years experience, she has now built a team of dedicated wedding and events specialists to style and implement events from small parties to large corporate events and festivals.